Encyclopedia of Mental Disorders  
Encyclopedia of Mental Disorders



Postby bounce » Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:36 pm

I am new to this forum and just looking for answers, a place for support and to vent (hopefully be a support as well).
My husband of over 38 years has ocpd I think or the closest I can come up with to self diagnosing him. Along with severe health issues from car acciedent which left him with a short bowel and cronic pain. Probaly hormanal and diatary malfunction contributing to problems as well. Therapy off and on w/ counsolers, phycitrist, meds. (no longer taking) christian marriage counselor all to no avail and short lived.
Many of the traits described in these forums and what I have researched fit him to tee. How ever some do not. Like any illness I am sure the symptoms or habitual traits vary from individual to individual. He poseses the workaholic trait to the point of fixating on tasks, neglecting relationships (ours) and doesn't maintain long term ones either. They last obssesivly for a length of time then usually end badly (always the others fault, in his mind). He is obsessive compulsive in some areas and completely disorganized at the same time. Which doesn't seem to fit the norm. We own 5 acres and he compulsivly hoards junk (likes to wheel and deal) but it is not kept in a organized fashion. He will clean it then make it a mess again over and over. Finishing a task almost to completion and then the last little bit never gets finished.
Constantly is having to be busy at something or if sits will sleep. Depression comes and goes. Prefers to be left alone to do own thing and things run normally, but when I get to the end of my rope and feel the need to talk, it end up in a fight, and the pattern is either all out war, which I am now choosing against and just settling( which only lasts for so long) or complience on his part, done in an angry way only to slip back into the same old habits with in a very short amount of time.
Lieing accompanise his behavior, keeping money to him self yet our finances are a wreck! So keeping money for the future crises doesn't fit. However the need for more money is always the excuse for the workaholic behavior. Lack of any quality time with me or kids or family is the norm ,all not the case in his eyes ,when addressed. Until he comes to the point after an argument that he complies when threat of leaving has accured.
Unable to handle stress and can not talk for very long about any important issues in our life because his "head is to full to deal with it" he says and coping skills are just not normal . Yet he creates so much stress in his disorganized scheduling of his day that it seems counter productive to this low coping ability. When suggestions given to improve this not accepted well and his way is always "I am doing the best I can" or "I havent done anything wrong" ect...... I always try to say its not about who's wrong just how can we compromise and fix these issues.
I could go on and on, I just love him and don't want our marraige to end. Yet I feel hopeless at times for change and I am tiered of being lonely and living in such disfunction. Help!!!!!
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Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:00 pm

Postby ChemGirl » Tue May 05, 2009 5:51 pm

Sounds like OCPD. How about a counselor? I will be sitting in on my husband's psyc visit soon.
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Joined: Tue May 05, 2009 4:30 pm

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