Encyclopedia of Mental Disorders  
Encyclopedia of Mental Disorders

ashtray service as masochism

ashtray service as masochism

Postby ashtray49 » Tue Sep 25, 2007 8:12 pm

I have serious problem.I am 50y old and I have been masochist from my 17.Now I see that I must seek some help.Last 2 years I have had phantasies as serving my mistress as an ashtray.They are very strong and I can't escape from them.As a matter of fact,I don't have any mistress only in my phantasy.So i started eat ashes from cigarettes and put off cigarettes on my tongue.After that I started eating cigarete buts.First that practice was sporadic but now I can't stop.I see that I will destroy myself and I can't help myself.I hate myself after that but tomorrow I am again aroused with these phantasies and all is starting again.I am reluctant to seek prof.help but I can't live like this anymore.
Every suggestion is very welcome.Thank you very much.
ashtray49
 
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