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NPD - is my friend a narcissist?

NPD - is my friend a narcissist?

Postby rpheslam » Sat Jan 31, 2009 8:18 pm

Hello

I am hoping to connect with someone who is knowledgeable of Narcissistic Personality DIsorder.

I live in Australia and I very generously flew a friend of seven years from Spain to visit me in Melbourne. My friend is a stunningly attractive, 33 year old man.

The night before his plane home left he went out, met someone and did not return for 24 hours. During this day he was "missing" he never once called me. As he did not have his phone with him, I could not call him. I rescheduled his flight at a cost when it became apparent that he would miss it. When he came home he would not speak and when he did he was aggressive. His "new friend" bought him a ticket home for later in the week. He made no apology for disappearing and did not care one bit about how sick with worry I was. The next day he left to be with his new friend.

Since this time, I have tried emailing him but I only receive the most hate filled and venomous, trashy emails accusing me of every crime under the sun. In one, he claims to be "larger than life" and that my hurt that he disappeared and never contacted me makes me "mentally sick" for "thinking that I own someone". He also has a habit, a habit I have just noticed, of referring to himself in the third person.

His complete lack of empathy and his constant abuse and venomous emails lead me to believe he suffers from NPD. He is a 33 year old barman and has trained in acting school in NY. Other than this, he has done nothing with his life. He has always been an incredibly charming and friendly man. He had, for all appearances, a successful 6 year relationship when he was in NY. This ended in 2007 and he returned to Spain in May 2008.

This experience has left me shattered and greatly confused.

Any thoughts?

Many thanks
rpheslam
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Jan 31, 2009 7:59 pm
Location: Australia

Postby permission2shine » Sat Jun 06, 2009 2:36 am

GET AWAY AND STAY AWAY FROM THIS MAN. He is NOT A FRIEND if he is behaving like this. I suspect that not only might he be a nacissist, he also might be sociopathic (charming, got you to buy him a ticket to Australia, didn't take responsibility for his side of the bargain, has no remorse for his actions etc). These people can be very dangerous and harmful to your well being. My father was both nacissitic/sociopathic, by clinical definition. He caused untold misery and pain to not only his own family but to anyone taken in by his charm.
permission2shine
 
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Joined: Sat Jun 06, 2009 2:20 am

Thank you!

Postby rpheslam » Sun Jun 07, 2009 1:07 am

Thank you very much for your reply. I have concluded that he does indeed suffer from NPD and I have well and truly managed to put this experience behind me. It still causes much hurt when I think about it but at the end of the day I remind myself I was dealing with a narcissist and attempting to deal with such people is "like spitting in the ocean". Again, thank you for your reply.


[quote="permission2shine"]GET AWAY AND STAY AWAY FROM THIS MAN. He is NOT A FRIEND if he is behaving like this. I suspect that not only might he be a nacissist, he also might be sociopathic (charming, got you to buy him a ticket to Australia, didn't take responsibility for his side of the bargain, has no remorse for his actions etc). These people can be very dangerous and harmful to your well being. My father was both nacissitic/sociopathic, by clinical definition. He caused untold misery and pain to not only his own family but to anyone taken in by his charm.[/quote]
rpheslam
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Jan 31, 2009 7:59 pm
Location: Australia

NPD is my friend a narcissist

Postby Karapaz » Tue Jun 09, 2009 3:38 am

Never met a mirror I didnt like, if my parents are to be believed. I have a very sensitive ego. So I suppose I can be narcissistic at time. shrugs Self love is not a bad thing. How can you accept someone elses love for you if you cant even love you?
Karapaz
 
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Joined: Tue May 19, 2009 3:03 am
Location: USA

Postby guitarman » Tue Feb 02, 2010 7:39 am

rphelam

Run from him like a scalded dog! Your relationship will only lead to divorce which would be exteremely painful. Multiply the agony you have endured by one hundred and that's what your divorce would be like.

There are plenty of other fish in the sea.
guitarman
 
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Joined: Tue Feb 02, 2010 7:32 am


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