Mental Disorders

[MPython]

I have developed and obssesion with my ex-girlfrind ever since we broke up 6 moth ago.I simply cannot get her out of my head,even though she treated me like hell I still care about her.The fact is I need to know what she is doing and who she is with at everytime of the day.It's driving me crazy!..Well,more 'crazy' than I already am.I have obsesive-compulsive disorder and bipolar disorder.Because of my thoughts on her I can barely concentrate at school,in my everyday work,everything.I try to force her out of my mind,but I just gets tougher every time.I don't really love her anymore,but nor do I hate her,despite what I suffered after the break-up.I just..need to know what she is doing,to at least talk to her,beacause she won't answer my calls and I can't give her e-mails either.So my question is.How do I forget about her and move on?

[mormon general]

I have no idea but i think u might love her. Try becomeing friends with one of her friends and use he/ her as an informant. thats wat I'm doing.

[Chrissie]

Your obsessiveness about your ex-girlfriend could be contributed to by your OCD tendency and other issues.

Did she initiate the relationship break up in which case it could be that you did not get a chance to let it tail off naturally or you may still be in the 'honeymoon' stage of a romantic relationship (see website of Helen Fisher (anthropologist) ?

It's normal to take time to get over the grief when you lose a relationship but if you are focusing so strongly on what she is doing etc. it is time to get some help especially as it is disrupting your studies etc.

[kallisti]

You mentioned you are dealing with OCD and bipolar...I hope that means you also have a relationship with a good therapist because those are serious conditions. I hope you will talk to your therapist about this.

Just my opinion here, but I know when I have obsessive thoughts (the kind that lead to anxiety attacks...yuck!) I use the rubber-band trick. I place a rubber band around my wrist (not too tight), and whenever the trigger-thought comes into my mind, I snap myself with the rubber-band!! It really works! I wonder if this trick might help you to get control of your obsessive thoughts?

The bottom line is, (my opinion) you DON'T really have to know where she is or what she's doing, but you DO have to be happy in order to lead a productive life. So please, free yourself from that burden and move on with your own happiness.

Good luck to you -

[Thumper]

Hey. I kinda understand what your going through. I was in a somewhat brief relationship with a women, about 5 years ago. To this date, I still remember her phone #. Dont really know what I am trying to say here, However being as honest as possible, I was obsessed for quite awhile after the relationship ended, in part due to the great sex. I found myself always wondering, who what where when. I also realized one day, I actually thought I was helping this woman with her own problems!! And she had plenty, coming from extremely abusive relationships, attempted suicides and such. In short, I had convinced myself, that I was the best thing that had happened to her. It took me about 2 years, to admit to myself, that she was actually dragging me down with her. This hit me like a ton of bricks!! Since the day i was honest with myself regarding this woman, I believe The road to healing/recovery was in front of me. Ive been in a healthy relationship now for about 2 1/2 years. I still think about the aforementioned from time to time, but in an entirely different light. Anyway, Thanks for letting me vent? Take care.