Mental Disorders

Lulu · Joined: 21 Dec 2006 Posts: 1

Recently separated from my husband who had an "encounter" with a 16 yr old male. At first I thought that means my husband is gay. Now I'm wondering if he's actually a pedophile. He denies he's gay. He says he wants me. But we've had sexual troubles for some time now. Husband is 54, I'm 53. The discovery of the "encounter" was seven years ago. We tried to work on our marriage and I tried to forgive him but it has been an awfully hard road to plow. We're married 33 years. How do I find out what is wrong with my husband and whether or not I can reconcile with him, or should divorce?

fortunf · Joined: 24 Dec 2006 Posts: 1

...is nothing more or less. Aside from the fact that you should have divorced your husband seven years ago, there are extreme underlying issues with which your husband is not dealing.

If he wanted you, he would be with only you, plain and simple. The fact that he has had homosexual relations, not to mention with a minor, denotes major personal problems on the part of your husband.

You say this has been SEVEN years ago? Perhaps YOU are the one with the problem.

LOSE the asshole while you still have a bit of life left. Forgiveness is CRAP.

Your husband is a sick, twisted PEDOPHILE, and you are lucky as well, that he has not contracted HIV and passed it on to you, (if in fact he hasn't already).

Thirty three years of marriage is NOT worth living with a pervert, but it is obvious that you are where you want to be.

Incidentally, I am a 42 year old male, never married, but live with a woman, and am quite heterosexual. I was sexually abused by a neighbor when I was 7 years old, and physically abused (beat up), on a consistent basis, by a 'guardian' when I was 11. Mother died when I was 8, Father dead at 19. Reads like a bad soap opera...

By all rights, I should have turned out like Jeffery Dahmer. I have NO sympathy for you or your husband.

The final analysis indicates that you are NOT interested in changing your situation, otherwise you would not be seeking advice on the Internet, would have come to the realisation that you are extremely co-dependant, in the most negative sense of the phrase, and you are exactly where you want to be.

Yep, truth hurts. Get a life, dump the queer and find something, or someone worth devoting your time to.

nympvmp · Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 4 Location: N.H.

well i have to agree with that guy, but he was a little harsh. from a legal stand point you should probably get rid of any thing connecting him and in case he does it again, with some one younger then 16. and from an emotional stand point : only you can chose whats right.

i hope you chose whats right for you and not what he wants from you.