Mental Disorders

GodThilla · Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 1:35 am Post subject: Would you call this a problem?

My boyfriend of six months is four years older than me. My friends and i joked about him being a pedophile and liking the girls "younger". He went along with it never really taking it personal or anything. Then one day he asked me where the jokes stemmed from, and why we said them. Then after that he told me that he was one. And that he's finally realized whats "wrong" with him.
Hes an average 20 year old male, goes to college has friends. A little anti-social at times, but besides this he seems typical. You would never expect this from someone like him.

I really have strong feelings for him, and i know he wouldnt do anything to little girls, but then again i worry about whats going to become of us, and why hes "wasting his time" with me.

I need some advice, some stuff to read, anything that could help me understand what hes going through, if there's anything i can do or if professional help, would help him.

axion · Joined: 20 Jan 2008 Posts: 5

What gives you the impression he was serious? Have you asked him in a very direct way about any past experiences? If he has admitted to this than you need to take some action right away!

As far as help goes... Look in your local yellow pages for professional help. You can also call your local law enforcement office for an outreach number...

MsFortitude · Joined: 14 Feb 2008 Posts: 2 Location: kansas

If your boyfriend is 20 and he is 4 years older than you then that means you are only 16. If he says he is a pedophile and you are only 16, then he is a pedophile. Your words are of age but your question based on the information you provided is not. Use that knowledge that you have been blessed with and grow learn and Love. Move on. Quickly.

kallisti · Joined: 12 Sep 2007 Posts: 12 Location: San Francisco

I believe that he is asking for help. A person wouldn't make an admission in that manner if he wasn't concerned about it himself. It would be wise for him to talk with a qualified therapist BEFORE he does something that will ruin his and some innocent voctim's life! On the other hand, pedophilia involves children up to age 12, if I am not mistaken. And that is a problem! But being attracted to TEENAGED girls is fairly common - illegal if he acts on it depending on his age (age differences vary in different States) but I think that if HE thinks it's a problem, obviously it's a problem. He deserves to live a life free from shame. I hope he gets help and sorts it all out before hurting himself or others! It may not seem like it at 16...but 20 is still very young!

nidorecall · Joined: 17 May 2008 Posts: 2

him being twenty and you being sixteen does not necessarily classiffy him as a pedofile. although it is technically illegal that is only a four year difference and is very common. now if he was late twentys and in a relationship with you that would be consider pediphila. or say he is twenty and like 11, 12, 13 year olds and younger that would be a problem. but it seems to me as if he was just joking when he commented he has a problem....